Recharging


It has been a long summer in the city. I've been quiet on the blog lately, mostly because I've been so busy that it's tough to find a spare moment to sit down and write. Since school ended, I've been auditioning and taking dance classes, but mostly, I've been working full-time at a desk job.

I hate to admit it, but I have been feeling uninspired. I believe that this is a "down-time" to prepare me for more creative times ahead. Sometimes we have to crawl under a rock and recharge in order to be able to run full speed ahead again.

It's a funny transition to go from making art all day at school, to investing your time, full-time, into someone else's company. Sometimes I struggle with the balance of "survival job" vs. making art. Both can take up all your energy, emotionally and physically, and I have trouble doing both at the same time. If I'm in it, I don't know how to not to give 100%. I know a lot of creative people struggle with the same dilemma. You want to make money to support your art, but you also don't want your art to go stagnant. It's very easy to get lulled into the sense of security that regular work can provide. It talks sweetly in your ear, saying, "Just think of what you can do with all that money! You could upgrade your cellphone, you could go on vacation, you could finally have nice clothes." (All of which I've done in the past few months.)

Last weekend I traveled to Washington, D.C. to film a fitness industrial, promoting the benefits of yoga and a healthy life. I felt so calm and comfortable on set, like putting on a pair of comfy shoes. I had a blast, and it was one of those moments when everything clicks in, and I know I am right where I am supposed to be, doing what I was meant to be doing. I know it may sound a bit kooky, but I was working in that sweet spot, that zone, where you are concentrating and having so much fun, that the time flies in an instant. Doing this also checked off a long-time goal of mine: to feel healthy, strong, and comfortable in my skin while doing a fitness shoot.

Coming up in October, I am looking forward to working on a new musical, with a fabulous theater company with people I adore. September feels like a very long month, but I am keeping my eye on the end of the tunnel. October means freedom, expression, having a job that I love waking up to every morning, and fueling my creative self. Once I'm back in the city in January, I'm taking the leap into full-time auditioning. No desk job to hide behind. This is my chance to shine and keep pushing my dreams into my reality.

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